“The stability of a society depends on the extent to which the members of that society feel they are being treated justly.”

– John Rawls

In college, my roommates had Great Danes. Max and Liza.

When I fed them, I’d take Max’s bowl and set it on one side of a long porch.

Max would stand by his bowl, glance at it, and then look over at Liza’s bowl as I carried it to the other side of the porch.

Liza would follow me as I set her bowl down. She’d take a look at it, then look back over at Max’s bowl.

“Eat!”

They’d sprint towards each other’s bowls and wolf their meal down.

Presumably, each was confident that they now had the best bowl of food.

Precisely because they had the other’s food.

The importance of fairness

Fairness is such a deep sense of need for people.

When the demand for fairness turns ugly, it can look like jealousy or resentment. Even revenge.

As a parent of three children, I spend a great deal of time mediating a sense of fairness between them.

Fairness is at the root of many organizational issues. Employee compensation, workload sharing, expectations, partnership squabbles…fairness sometimes is difficult to find.

Fairness consumes much of our civic discourse – what are fair policies or budgets? What is fair in terms of representation in the media? What is fair in terms of protection of rights or expectations of responsibilities?

Fairness is difficult and complicated. But as the quote above suggests, without it there cannot be stability within our workplace, our home or community.

What is fair?

Like it or not, a significant amount of leadership energy and time is consumed with addressing questions related to fairness.

As commonly experienced as the sentiment is – it isn’t easy to define.

For many fairness = impartiality. No special treatment.

But is that always fair?

My daughter has Down Syndrome.

What is fair for her? Should she always be treated impartially – as if she were no different than anyone else?

Or should I treat her differently?

Should I expect others to treat her differently? Or the same?

That question is not easy to answer. And no one answer seems to fit every situation.

Does fairness = equity?

In other words, should she always have the same level playing field as everyone else? The same starting point for opportunities?

Is that even possible?

Does fairness =  equality? Should she always have “the same” as everyone else? Should I place the same responsibilities on her as I do her brothers?

Will she have the same access to job opportunities in her future? The same income? Should she?

Does fairness = justice? Should she receive exactly what she deserves? Based on…her abilities? Her desires? Her efforts? Her contribution?

I deeply want her to be treated fairly.

But I’m not always sure what that means.

The three great challenges of fairness

Fairness is vulnerable to perception: Even though I fed Max and Liza exactly the same meals, they perceived that the other was getting a better deal.

It was impossible to reason with them. It’s often impossible to reason with people too.

Fairness is ambiguous: What is fair?  Do I want impartiality? Or equity? Can equality, or sameness, ever be more or less appropriate than justice (getting what I deserve)?

Fairness often doesn’t feel fair: The route to increase fairness for one person or group is often perceived as unfair to another.

The three ingredients of fair decisions

For leaders, it is important that we are diligent to be as fair as we can. Even if the path to fairness seems confused.

I find that a solid starting point for fairness is the Golden Rule:

Treat others like you’d want them to treat you.

Some people obfuscate this simple principle. But for most people, most of the time, it’s a helpful guideline.

I have also found that regardless of whether we are pursuing fairness in the form of equity, equality or justice people need to experience all three of the following to feel like they’ve experienced something that was fair.

1. They need to trust the leader: A leader can’t demand trust and is foolish to just expect it. Trust is either gifted or earned. However it is gained, it can be easily lost and needs to be maintained.
2. They need to trust the process: A leader may be trusted, but if the process they use isn’t, it won’t matter. People need to feel like the process for making decisions, allocating resources, sharing authority, rewarding contributions or bringing accountability is whatever that may mean to them.
3. They want to feel heard & respected: The desire for respect is deep and easily underappreciated. Even when someone is in an unfairly advantaged position – they will feel like they’ve been treated unfairly if they don’t feel heard or respected.

Don’t miss these ingredients

Leaders who cultivate their credibility, build good processes and help others feel heard and respected will find that those they lead are more likely to feel fairly treated.

Some leaders resist this next concept, but it doesn’t make it any less true: Perception of fairness matters. Perhaps more than anything.

You might have served up exactly the same meals in your bowls, but that only matters if others see it that way too.

Take good care,

Christian